Taken with instagram
Taken with instagram
Big sis little sis (Taken with instagram)
My Lost Love. I thought i was without you, far into a realm where your haunting me doesn’t exist. I was so wrong. Here you are, there you’ve been. Always surfacing from depths that get deeper. No longer am I searching for them - I’ve felt what they behold, and the journey alone hurts my spirit. I wish to define you. I am out of the grants you once gave. And your missing, although you’re always there. Lost. My lost love. Where have you gone without me? What could be so good. Why do I feel you without your physical presence? You’re lost.
These expectations try to filter through, pleading for an escape route bounced back on the walls of my skin that thickens - elongating the path - shortening the possibility of you that’s never been in sight.
I can’t figure out the pull nor the person on the other side of the rope.
Why with burns upon my palms, I return for another round with even more hope than the previous, more alone than the previous. How am I still standing here? It may be this bit of jealousy that keeps me. Envy because you move so easily; defeat after defeat - these battles gain you the wall you’ve built. It may be this heart full of anger - rage of frustration for not being able to stand with you, only before you in utter desperation. I gave up on thinking it was love. Now I just wonder. I try to figure it out and maybe that’s just it. I just want to understand how you can be so inhumanly human while I burst from things that seem to only exist solely inside me. Do you see them? Do I so easily give them away? If I explode - these parts of me would simply float around you won’t they? Won’t you let any part of me dissolve into you? Hear me. It may be soon I learn to quit the fight in me. Should I quit the fight in me?
